I’ve seen unforgiveness destroy relationships and destroy people. Many of us have someone who is just tough to forgive but if we don’t learn to forgive and get past the transgressions of others it turns into resentment and then bitterness… and bitterness is like taking the poison yourself and expecting someone else to die.
When you forgive others you’re not approving what they have done to you but rather releasing yourself from resentment and all the poisonous chemicals that run through your body when you harbor all these bad feelings inside. You’re setting yourself free.
Think of forgiving as a circle that you need to go all the way around to complete the cycle of forgiveness. Sometimes you’ll get all the way around the circle and sometimes you won’t. That’s because you’re only responsible for your half of the circle. You can’t control others and can’t control their half of the circle.
I just met Anthony Ray Hinton who was in solitary confinement for 31 years for a murder that he didn’t commit. He said that if he didn’t learn to forgive and release those who had unjustly jailed him… it would have destroyed HIM… not them!!
The first step is starting a discussion with someone you trust about why forgiveness may be hard for you. There are some reasons for this based on our natural preferences. STOP GUESSING: FOR COUPLES will help you start a discussion with conversation starters that come from your personality assessment. It’s the personalized conversation starters that could give you a big headstart. Believe me, if you do this properly the circle of forgiveness becomes smaller and smaller and much easier to navigate.
So often we just don’t know where to start and more often than not we just never think of having these conversations until after there is a problem. How about if we could start talking together before there was a problem. Stop guessing will also provide your personalized conversation starters with some of the most effective tips for you to initiate this process of forgivness. Everyone on the planet has times when they struggle with this. Let’s face it there are so many details to think about in our lives that we often never have these conversations. Let stop guessing accelerate your relationship to new heights without spending 20 years to figure this stuff out. I’ve heard many people say that these personality assessment based conversation starters could have save them 20 years of their life. Start now and it just 15 conversations have about 20 minutes you may save that same 20 years.